Mid-Life women, Self-Care is Your Medicine

Fatigued, cranky, irritable? Over-tired and dragging yourself around? You may have just hit 45, but you feel older. You can’t stay up as late as you used to and multi-tasking has gone out the window. Yes, mid-life and menopause are forcing you to face the doctor in the mirror: Self-care is your medicine.

If you have a secret belief that self-care is selfish, you may be afraid that it’s ‘frivolous’ or time-wasting to do something just for you,  like a drawing class or anything that feeds your creative woman’s soul. 

It’s not surprising really. Our culture values productivity, drive and forward motion. We spend our lives with the On button pressed. But more and more of us are hitting burn-out and fatigue. We have a hard time turning it all off, until a health issue pops up and we are forced to give ourselves permission to play or rest.

I remember in my forties feeling so tired that by 8:30 pm I was calling my daughter to tuck me into bed. What was driving me to do it all myself, take on too many volunteer jobs, on top of cooking/ cleaning/chauffeuring my kids and being General Manager of the Universe? Finally, it took a ski accident and a broken leg to slow me down. I had no choice but to ask for help. My husband took over the morning routine for a few weeks, and became their ski buddy on the weekends, while I hobbled around with crutches and lay with my legs up the wall listening to YoYo Ma.  I learned the hard way to take care of myself.

In our go go go world, the softer values of rest, reflection and playtime may seem frivolous. But they are exactly the antidote we need. Getting in touch with our inner need for rest is an important survival tool at mid-life. It is in our best interest to slow down, revise the list of things to do, and put our Self care on that list.

Butterfly woman in nature (SoulCollage(R) card)

How? Prioritize; ask your family to help by chopping vegetables or doing dishes. Teens (and husbands) can do laundry. Consider stopping to breathe for 5 minutes a few times a day just to look out the window at the new flowers blooming. How can Superwoman be of service when she is maxed out, dragging her cape in the mud?

Bottom line is that you are the fulcrum everyone is leaning on. The rock of dependability. But you must be solid & grounded yourself before you can be there for them.  Please don't wait until you have a breakdown before you give yourself a break. Make room in your life for you!

If that means having a talk with your spouse or boss, find the courage to go there. Remember, you need to take the time – no one will give it to you. Banish guilt about appearing Selfish. Self-Care is your medicine, baby.

Journal Questions: Am I ready to make room for myself in the busy schedule? Am I willing to mother myself and take baby steps towards self-care?  What practical thing can I do for myself this week?

COME GIVE YOURSELF A DAY OF CREATIVE REST, at the SELF-INDULGENT CREATIVE RETREAT on SUNDAY JUNE 22, 9:30 – 5:00 PM, Cozy Creek Studio, in St. Lazare, Qc.

SEE my website for details and to REGISTER, receive discount of 50% if you sign up before May 31, 2025 https://www.jenniferboire.com/courses-retreats-and-training

Cozy Creek Studio, St Lazare

Author Jennifer Boire, MA English, has published four books of poetry, survived menopause and wrote a self-help guide to help other women. She leads Creative Self-Care retreats to help women restore themselves & cultivate faith in their inner resources. Author of The Tao of Turning Fifty, What Every Woman in Her Forties Needs to Know. Follow her on Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest at Inner Wisdom Guide www.jenniferboire.com. Facebook