There is Nothing Wrong with Me
I find myself in a funny position sometimes - wanting to help other women achieve self-acceptance through my journal classes and retreats, facing my own imperfections, flaws and lack of centeredness and acceptance, and also wanting to affirm, like this title: There is nothing wrong with me.
Being sort of lumped into the 'self-help' category I guess, with what I do, I also resist that label. Because every day I am inundated with emails, newsletters and websites claiming that I need improvement, or a new product, or a new attitude, or a new practice of some healthy diet or regimen, or 300 hours of exercise to get in shape, or whatever.
Don't you get tired of all this pushing and prodding? I know I do. Radical self-acceptance is not about being lazy, however, and just snarfing down the 500 gram bag of Miss VIckie's potato chips or having a devil-may-care attitude. I know what I need to do to be healthy (by age 57, you would think that a little wisdom has seeped in). But what I'm talking about is this "fix me up" culture we are surrounded by in the media - on newspapers, television, women's magazines, talk show hosts, everybody has a fixation with fixing themselves. Whether through botox, face-lifts or the latest new "cleanse", it appears there is always something wrong that can be fixed.
So just for today, (one day at a time) I am suggesting a full scale retreat from trying to fix anything. Try just slowing down and appreciating instead. Appreciate what is, notice what you have already, reward yourself for steps you are already taking, change the nasty pants self-talk from what is wrong with me? to what is right with me? I guess that is a 'fix' I am suggesting too. It's a hard habit to get away from, isn't it?
But consider this: there is nothing wrong with you. Even your foibles and faults exist as a lesson plan from the universe about self-acceptance and love. If I can allow myself to full express my self just as I am, let go of judging myself so harshly, I have no doubt that I will be less judgmental of others as well. Like this affirmation: "I will choose to accept everyone in my life with the same radical acceptance I have for myself, knowing that we are all perfectly imperfect human beings simply doing the best we can." - Jackson Kiddard.
So take that to heart today. Just for today. Take it into your being, and let it resonate. I am OK just the way I am. There is nothing wrong with me. And breathe into this little moment of relief that you have just created. Whew! it takes a load of guilt off, doesn't it?
Have a great month of June - it's a sunny day in Montreal, after a few rainy cold ones, the peonies are blossoming, the calendula in my rock garden are blooming, the poppies are nodding their heavy heads, and I just want to go outside and smell the roses!
If you need help letting down the angst a notch, I've just published Musemother's Relaxation CD, with centering breath exercises, visualisations to meet your Wise Inner Self, and soothing music. Until I get the website paypal up and running, you can just drop me an email and I will mail it to you for $12.00 plus shipping, to your door!
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